I was pretty shocked by the recent
story in the press about the woman who’s ‘friends’ wrote her a letter
calling her out on her Facebook habits. The content of the letter itself wasn't
shocking but the fact that they decided to do things in this way made me uncomfortable.
What major crime had
this woman committed? Sharing her enthusiasm about her child a little bit
too much for their liking.
It’s common for people to over share on Facebook these days.
I imagine most of us have annoyed friends, family or colleagues without even
knowing about it and I bet most of us have been annoyed by things we've seen on
Facebook (my personal irritant is people sharing Britain First posts). But I
don’t think it’s right to call someone out on it under the umbrella of ‘honesty’.
First of all, you don’t have
to be friends on Facebook with everyone you meet. If someone posts a load of
stuff that you don’t like you can unfriend them. If that feels a bit harsh you
can ‘mute’ peoples’ posts and limit what you see from them. That way you don’t
have to see all the things that are getting on your nerves.
To gang up on someone and write them a letter seems wholly unnecessary. Especially when they are just
enjoying be a new mum, and using their Facebook page to share that. If her friends
thought she was on-line too much, why didn't they stop and wonder why? Was she
feeling a bit lonely at home as a new parent and found Facebook a good way to
keep up with things? Maybe she just thought her friends would want to share in
the joy she was feeling as a new parent.
Another thing to bear in mind is that we all share an edited
version of ourselves on-line. Social media can get pretty competitive as we all
strive to show our best selves, and what an awesome time we are having. It’s not
the whole picture and we don’t know what people may or may not be dealing with
offline.
I get pretty annoyed with people who prescribe to the ‘tell
it like it is’ school. The idea that people use honesty as a stick to beat
others is not something I agree with. Honesty is a good thing but if you’re
using it as an excuse to be nasty to people then you need to have a look at yourself
first. I think being truthful should be balanced with remembering that people
have feelings and can get hurt by your words or actions.
And if you think I post too many pictures of my dog on
Facebook then feel free to unfriend me or mute me because I'm not going to stop
any time soon.
Best Dog Ever :) |
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